Without My Heart
by MidnightSky101
Summary: The slash version of 'Without My Reflection'. After Fred's death, George is left without his twin, best friend, and heart. SLASH. TWINCEST. DON'T LIKE, PLEASE SELECT WTHOUT MY REFLECTION, YOU WILL BE MUCH MORE COMFORTABLE READING THAT!


**A/N: This is how this story started out, as a slash story, I decided to change it for those who dont like the pairing because I'm kind like that. :D (I personally prefer this version to the other one, but I would love to hear what you think, so please review!) **

**This story contains twincest, slash, bla bla bla...Please enjoy  
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Fred Weasley. _My_ Fred. He had my eyes, my nose, my hands, my hair…and my heart. He was the only person who knew _everything_ about me, and I him. He was my one and only true love. Nothing could come between us, not and girl, or any boy, or even any person, any disagreement or emotion…But something did, something I didn't think I'd have to deal with for many, many years.

Death, Fred's death.

And now, where my mirror image would have stood beside me, I stand alone. My days that were once filled with joy and laughter, are now lonely and silent. Where the bedroom used to be occupied by two, I sleep alone, praying that in the morning I will wake to find Fred sound asleep in my arms. Alive. But I never do.

My family all reacted in different ways. Percy keeps himself to himself, locking his bedroom door so that his tears are not seen. So many times I have walked past the door and heard sobbing and sometimes loud cries and curses to God, but I do not try to comfort him, he would not allow that.

Mum cleans non stop, scrubbing away at the floors and dusting around the house, anything to keep her mind off Fred, occasionally it fails and she breaks down and cries at random times, but it works most of the time, I think I even saw her smile today.

Ginny tries her best not to cry, she really does, but she can't help it, she lost her older brother; it's hard not to cry. She tries her best to hide her tears, running to her room before anyone can stop her to try to comfort her, but sometimes she can't stop the tears and she pulls her knees up to hide her face, or quickly hugs the nearest person and cries silently into their shoulder.

Ron holds back his tears, he sits silently, staring into space, he only talks when absolutely necessary, whispering quiet comforting words to Ginny when it's him she runs to, and mumbling an apology after bumping into someone because he is looking down as he walks.

Dad doesn't cry either, not in front of any of us, he has to be strong for the family. He tries his best to get our lives back on track, standing at Percy's door for hours on end, trying to convince him to come out, if only for a little while. He tried with my mother as well, saying things like 'Why don't you stop cleaning, just for a moment and have a cup of tea or something.' She often replies with 'Tea, yes of course, I'll make it.' just another thing for her to do.

He also comforts Ginny when she cries, stroking her back gently and saying things like 'We can't grieve forever,' and, 'Fred wouldn't want you to be sad, now, would he?' Which is true, Fred was kind and he loved her, he loved all of us, and in return we all loved him. And still do.

I follow my father's example, I hold back my tears from everyone and silently cry myself to sleep when everyone has gone to bed. I often sleep on Fred's bed, the smell of him surrounding me, as though he is still there with me. But I know he's not, and I cover my moth as tears begin streaming to silence my sobs.

I must have made a sound one night because I remember having my eyes tightly closed, wishing it was all a terrible nightmare, when I heard the door creak closed. I froze immediately. I felt someone wrap their arms around me and turned to see Ron. I turned away again and quickly wiped away my tears, even though he had already seen. He held me tightly as I continued to sob, something an older brother should do for his younger sibling.

He's the only one who really understands how much I lost that day, my brother, my best friend, and my lover, all at the same time. He found out about us accidentally, we had thought everyone had gone out, we didn't realise he was still there. He opened the bedroom door without knocking and we all froze. He just stared at us for ages, I on top of Fred on the bed.

"What are you two doing?" He had asked calmly after a while. I climbed off Fred and sat on the bed next to him, patting the bed for Ron to join us. He closed the door and sat at the end of the bed.

"Ron," Fred began, "We know this is weird, it's weird for us too, but..." Fred couldn't hold back the grin as he gripped my hand.

"It's not brotherly love anymore, it's more, much more." I added.

"We're in love" We finished together. We sat and talked about it for ages after that, us trying to explain it, and Ron trying his best to understand it. We made him promise, made him swear that he wouldn't tell anyone else, "they can't know." We had told him.

After some time, he nodded silently and stood up, pausing at the door. "Fred, George." He began without turning his head.

"Yes?" We answered in unison, both a little worried about what he would say.

"Be more careful, don't get caught next time, this isn't something society would accept easily." We both stared at him, amazed that he would say something so adult.

"Thank you." Fred whispered behind me.

"Thank you." I repeated as he left the room.

He kept his promise, nobody knows about us, and nobody ever will. It's our secret, no one else needs to know, so they won't. That's the way it is…

I choke up at the memory of my brother's lips against my own, it's sick it's wrong, it's unnatural, I know. But I don't understand how something that feels that right could be all of those things. We were in love, we didn't mean to be, we just were. And I don't care what you say, I love him. And I miss being able to hold him and kiss him and lie with him at night…

Last night, I was lay in my own bed, clutching Fred's Gryffindor scarf tightly and sobbing into it when there was a small knock at the door. I quickly sat up and dried my eyes, hiding the scarf under my pillow.

"Come in." I called, my voice still shaky. The door creaked open and Ginny's face appeared in the doorway, I could tell by her eyes that she had been crying.

"George…" She began, but was unable to finish. Instead, she ran across the room into my outstretched arms. I pulled her close to me held her tight as she cried. "George, I know he wouldn't want me to be sad, but I can't help it!" She sobbed, "I miss him so much!" She cried into my shoulder.

"Shh…I know, we all miss him, it's true that he wouldn't want you to be sad, but it's okay to cry…" I stopped talking and concentrated on holding the tears back. I closed my eyes and rocked her, my grip unconsciously lightening on her.

"Ginny?" I looked up to see Ron stood in the doorway. He briefly glanced at my face before stepping into the room and putting a hand on Ginny's shoulder. "Ginny, leave George alone, I think he wants some time to think." Ginny looked at him.

"But I…" She began. "No, I'm sorry, George." She kissed my cheek quickly. "I love you." She stood and began walking to the door.

"Ginny, if you want, you can stay with me tonight." Ginny smiled as best she could and nodded before leaving the room, sensing Ron wanted to talk to me alone.

"Thank you." George whispered. "I didn't know if I could have her here for much longer." I quickly wiped my eyes before the tears could fall. Ron nodded silently.

"It'll be alright, George, you'll see. And just think, with Fred watching from above, you'll b able to pull off loads of loads without getting caught." I smiled quickly.

"Maybe…I'm not sure if I'll be able to pull pranks any more…" I buried my face in my hands and rubbed my eyes.

"Goodnight, George." Ron gave my shoulder a comforting squeeze then turned to leave.

"G'night." I said quietly as the door closed.

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"I miss you, Fred." I mumble as I stand before the gravestone in the pouring rain. I've forgotten my umbrella, so the rain's running into my coat and down the back of my neck, making me shiver. "It's been boring without you, and Filch has got free time on his hands…It's weird." I laugh quietly and look up to the sky. "…What's it like?" I ask, knowing I won't get an answer. "You tell everyone that if they try anything funny, they'll have me to answer to when I get up there."

And then I can't joke anymore. "I miss you." I murmur. "I love you." I whisper. My hands turn to fists as rage builds up inside me. "Why did you have to go? Why wasn't it me? Why…" I fall to my knees as the tears still fall. Even as I scream at the sky, I can't help but feel slightly thankful that it was Fred. I would never want him to feel this pain.

Then suddenly, I feel as though someone is holding me. I look around, expecting to see someone, anyone, but I'm still alone, the rain falling to the ground right behind me. There is no one there. I look back to the stone and sniff. "Fred…" I lean on the gravestone to keep myself from falling to the ground. The wind picks up around me and my angel's grip seems to tighten around me. "Thank you." I whisper. "Will you stay with me?" No answer.

"George?" I hear someone call, I turn my head slightly to see Hermione. "George! Ron, he's over here!" She shouted, running towards me. The embrace disappears again, but I can still feel him near me, watching, ready to protect me. Hermione holds the umbrella above me.

"George! What the hell are you doing? You've been missing for hours! Do you have any idea how worried mum's been?" Ron shouts as he runs to me slipping slightly in the mud.

"I'm sorry." I murmur, not looking away from the stone. "I didn't mean to worry everyone." I look at Ron and Hermione. "Ron, I think it will be alright, because…Fred hasn't really left us, has he? Not as long as we remember him. And he's still near us, watching over us, keeping us safe, because that's the Fred thing to do." Ron smiles at me.

"Yeah…" He looks at the gravestone. "Thanks, Fred." He says. "Let's go home, mum's still worrying." I nod, still looking at the gravestone.

"Thanks Fred." I whisper before laying down a white rose and following Ron and Hermione out of the churchyard.

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**A/N: Tada! Well, considering it was my first attempt at a Harry Potter fanfic, I think that went well. Please review.**


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